Vampires are an ancient and powerful supernatural race known primarily for murdering and sucking the blood of innocents a clique at Hogwarts School known primarily for eating cereal with blood and being Goth.
Vampires in Popular Culture
There are four main stages in the evolution of vampires:
- Dracula by Bram Stoker. The most famous early vampire, Dracula Popularized the refined, elegant vampire who preyed on the nobility, in stark contrast to earlier, more bestial versions.
- Various books by Anne Rice. Popularized the idea that vampires are more fond of having sex than drinking blood.
- Twilight by Stephenie Meyer. Took Anne Rice's ideas even further, but with more subtle homosexual themes.
- My Immortal by Tara Gilesbie. Decided that instead of drinking blood or having sex, vampires' favorite activity was cutting their wrists. Sex is okay too though.
The Great Debate
Thanks to the untiring efforts of Stephenie Meyer and Tara Gilesbie, vampires are now inextricably linked with crap fantasy in the public mind. There is, however, something of a controversy over whose vampires are worse. Let us consider the worst aspects of both types.
Twilight
Meyerpires sparkle in the sun and are all strikingly beautiful. These, and most other complaints about them, are a rejection of "traditional" ideas of what it means to be a vampire. A number of vampires in Twilight reject the idea of drinking human blood, and may hunt animals instead. However, Stephenie Meyer at least preserves the idea that vampires are powerful supernatural beings at odds with humans, even if "at odds" only means that they eat at their own lunch table.
My Immortal
The "vampires" in My Immortal bear absolutely no resemblance to traditional vampires except that they are fond of eating blood, although they do not often bite people's necks. Since it is a Harry Potter fanfic, one may be inclined to think that they are like the wizards from that series, but in reality they are nothing more than Goths. They even cut themselves in order to get blood.
Conclusion
The story of western literature over the last century has been that of the degradation of vampires from feared supernatural hunters of the night to the laughingstocks of a site so dumb that it is itself the laughingstock of the rest of the Internet.